How to Not Suffer in Silence

By Tiffy Kink

As a black woman, I think that black people are some of the strongest human beings to ever exist on planet earth. However, we can sometimes be too prideful in ourselves, to the point where we are willing to suffer in silence. We have a tendency to let fear and shame invade our minds and silence us. This forces us to believe that we are the only ones going through whatever we are going through. While I believe that experiences are unique to the individual, I don’t believe that one individual is the only individual to have gone through a particular experience. At least that’s not always the case. And even when it is, there are some ways to help you feel like you’re not alone. Here are 9.

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Prayer
Prayer is a very powerful thing. Putting your situation or problem in prayer can help start the healing process. Praying to God or whatever higher power you believe in about the trials and tribulations can feel as though a burden has been lifted. Prayer can also lead to guidance.

Meditation
The traditional idea of mediation is not required for this, as there are many ways to meditate. Sitting down and thinking is a form of meditation. It’s also great for those who like to go into a situation head first with guns blazing. Not a good idea in many cases. Sitting down and looking at a problem can help you find different ways to approach and solve it.

Google it
Literally. Just google it. Take your situation, find some relatable keywords and see what comes up. You’d be surprised at how many forums and articles are on the internet of people sharing their experiences on the World Wide Web. This can provide unique or alternative solutions and different perspectives.

Mediation 
This one is good if you have an issue that involves a mutual and neutral party. Like a friend or a family member. You can ask that neutral party to help you stage a mediation meeting with the party you’re having issues with. Of course, this will only work if you and the other person is willing to have an open mind and open ear to hearing each other out and vice versa, and the mutual-neutral party has to remain un-biased.

Find a Support Group
Support groups can be helpful by teaching accountability in a group setting. Group discussions can help you make connections outside of your own personal world by being able to relate to other people and their stories.

Start a Blog
Sometimes the best way to find support is through sharing your story and things you have experienced. It can be a little intimidating to put yourself out there in the world and on the internet, but you might find it to be a liberating experience and you may also help others going through the same thing as you.

Talk to a Friend or Family Member
This may not be the most conducive method for everyone, but if you have someone who you feel comfortable talking to, talking to them about what you’re going through may provide you with extra resources and a different point of view. You may even be surprised at how supportive your loved ones and friends can be in a time of need.

Seek Counseling
Sometimes talking to a stranger or seeking professional help may be a more ideal approach to your problem or situation as strangers are usually less likely to pass visible judgment about you and don’t have much information about your past. They know only what you tell them.

Get the Authorities Involved
If you are in a particular situation where you feel as though your life is being threatened or you feel as though you or a loved one may be put in danger by another individual, go to the police. Sometimes we think that we have things under control because we overestimate how well we know the situation or the person we are dealing with. While people are creatures of habit for the most part, that doesn’t mean people don’t snap or don’t become violent when things aren’t going their way. If the individual you are dealing with starts to become aggressive or begins to make threats towards you or your loved ones, go to the police and start to document these things.

No matter what you’re going through, the road to healing takes time. The situation you are in, though it may feel like it now, will not last forever. Always try your very best to think things through and reach out when you begin to feel overwhelmed. There is no shame in admitting that you need some help.

                           Do you suffer in silence?                              

About Tiffy
Tiffy kink is a New York based Sex Blogger whose goal is to spread sex positivity and break down barriers for the sexually deprived and repressed through her blog posts and sex toy reviews where she not only talks about her interactions with sex and masturbation, but she also introduces her readers to body-safe sex toys and advice. If you like what you’ve read and would like to see more, visit her blog Aquakink.com Follow her on Twitter @Theaquakink

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