You would've been 92 today. Or, 39 for the 52nd time if we let you tell it. Most of the fam would say that you've been gone for almost a year now, but I know you never left.
You're not where you used to be, tho... I can't call you, even though I've started to a few times. I can't fly to STL to spend our summers brunching, casino boating and ish talking. And when I think about those things, the things that we can't do anymore, it feels terrible. It feels like I've lost you. Like you're really gone. But those bad feels act like a beacon-- a beacon to remind me to look for you where you are, NOW (not where you aren't). When I close my eyes, even through these tears, I feel you. You're here. And in my dreams, we talk and laugh. And Boogie. Your mini squad. She still snuggles with the blanket you crocheted her every night. She talks about you all the time and got teary eyed last night when I reminded her about your birthday. You are such a huge part of our lives. We love to tell Gma stories. And with the current circumstances, this one has been coming up a lot--
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A few weeks before you transitioned, you'd get a bit confused (or so we thought) and ask how my son was doing. I'd remind you that I only had the one child, a daughter, Gia. And you'd roll your eyes and say, "I know you have Gia, but how's your son doing?! Where is he?!" You were so sincere and persistent in your inquiry, but I didn't think much of it until months later when we found out that we were pregnant! I couldn't do anything but smile and I immediately knew it was the son you were talking about. Thank you for sending us an angel. I promise to tell him all about you... but I'm sure he already knows you well.
Love,
Nikki
#BFFsFromJump #MyHeadTho
Gma holding my sister, Syl and me, with my favorite red cup filled with lemonade I liked to drink with a spoon :)
Gma's trip to NC to help me welcome Boogie
Gma x Boogie dance off!
scalp massages in the final days
from Curly Nikki | Natural Hair Care http://ift.tt/2cQsyGF
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